Budweisers New Craft Beer Called SPIT

ST. LOUIS, Mo. –

After causing an uproar in the beer community over a Super Bowl commercial that mocked craft beer and micro breweries, Budweiser has decided to inflame the situation further by marketing their own “hand crafted” beer called SPIT.

A Budweiser spokesman released this statement:

“SPIT is an every mans beer. Our drinkers are the real drinkers and they like to occasionally slam down their beers. Well anyone who’s ever drank a craft beer knows it’s way too heavy and bloated with flavor to be able to slam. Until now. We introduce SPIT which will in fact not only be hand brewed but ‘mouth brewed’ as well. This is where the brewer will gargle at least 24oz of pure dilluted fructose laced yeast, swirl it around in his mouth and spit it back into each barrel brewed. This is a groundbreaking process and the mouth swirling breaks down the heaviness of the beer allowing the drinker to pound craft beer after craft beer, the way beer should be consumed!”

The spokesman went on to explain that the filtering processing employed afterwards eliminates all worry of contamination or germ spreading.

Critics are not buying this recent press release, and see it as just another attempt from Budweiser to make fun of micro brews.

“We are the innovators here. We would have known about this mouth gargling process if it were true. I don’t think it is though, I think it is another attempt to mock us. It’s pathetic really,” states micro brewer Jay Macfabie.

Bud drinkers on the other hand, welcome SPIT. “I’d drink it hell yeah. I’d go to these trendy micro places and slam SPIT after SPIT right in front of all these hippie hipster queer bodies faces who don’t know the first thing about true beer drinkin’,” said Mack Turnuckle from Idaho.

SPIT is alledgedly to be released during the annual Craft Beer Extravaganza Festival of Micro Brewed Wonderfulness which is slated for June, in Scranton, New Jersey. Whether this is to be a one time mock by Budweiser, or a serious attempt to work the craft beer angle, remains to be seen.