Cop Caught Masturbating at Starbucks

CAMDEN COUNTY, Pennsylvania –

Off-duty police officer Lt. Benito Gonzalez was seated at a Starbucks in the Philadelphia, Pennsylvania area, when he decided to pull down his shorts and masturbate.

“It was the first day of the year for unusually warm weather, and many of the college-aged female patrons wear wearing short-shorts, and tiny skirts with flip-flops. They continually fanned themselves as sweat accumulated around their chest area,” said a Camden County Starbucks patron who wanted to remain anonymous.

It was then that Officer Gonzalez allegedly ordered a “Fappucino”, a likely Freudian slip for the popular frappuccino drink. After ordering his “fappucino,” he sat down and allegedly began ogling many of the females seated around him.

“I think he just couldn’t control himself. He was surrounded by all these sweaty, barefoot babes who kept squirming in their chairs, kicking off their sandals, extending their legs and partially lifting up their shirts revealing their belly’s to fend off the unexpected heat. Meanwhile, that cop was sipping his frapp with one hand, and he had his other hand in his underwear, while his shorts were down at his knees. Man, he was really going for it to. Slurping heavily on his frapp, and jerking frantically on his choad.”

An administrative hearing is being set which will determine whether or not Gonzalez loses his job.

“A swift and thorough investigation is being conducted. We are working to ascertain all of the facts in this matter with Cherry Hill Police Department and the Camden County Prosecutor’s Office,” said Camden Metro Police Chief Scott Thompson.